Shift to Connection-Based Parenting (Relating)

It's time to shift your Mindset, Lifestyle, and Village towards Connection!

When I first started connection-based parenting (relating), my son was three years old. I was elated that I had found an approach to parenting different from how I was raised and supportive of healthy child development. 

I jumped in head first offering my warm attention, creating a safe space for him to express himself and listening to him release his emotions freely.  This allowed him to sleep well, be open to trying new foods, and cooperate.

Parenting became easier until...

One bedtime, a few weeks into connection-based parenting, everything changed. My son stood on his bed, tears streaming down his cheeks. I stayed close and offered my warm attention, creating a safe space for my son to release his emotions, because for him it was as natural as going pee or poo. 

I felt the heaviness of being torn between my beliefs from childhood and my new beliefs from becoming a connection-based parent. I looked at my son and thought,

"Bringing connection and allowing all emotions is hard. I never got this growing up” 

Growing up, when I cried I was met with “There is nothing to be upset about” or “You’re OK” or sadly I was left alone.  I grew up with emotionally unavailable adults who were dismissive when I showed any emotion.

A moment later, the belief that emotions were bad popped into my mind and my emotions caught up with me. I was overwhelmed with frustration and boiling over with intense anger.

I called for my husband to tag me out and bolted to the living room collapsing before the fireplace.

I saw my pain.

It was in those early days of covid. I was living in a new city on the other side of the country away from family and friends. There was so much uncertainty. 

I was struggling with anxiety.  My heart ached for the five-year journey of infertility and loss it took for me to become a parent. I was finally a parent and I couldn't connect with my son.  I was heartbroken.

I didn't feel seen, heard, or cared for…it was too heavy. That deep sense of being emotionally disconnected was growing stronger. 

I wanted to do things differently and shift from control-based relating towards connection. I made some progress but I couldn't maintain it. 

Tears flowed down my cheeks. I allowed my body to tremble, shake, and eventually cry deeply.

When my tears stopped. My body was still, I found the missing piece that opened me up to doing things differently than my parents.

I committed to unpacking my emotional baggage! I shifted my mindset, lifestyle, and village towards connection and started to re-parent myself.  All while repairing my relationship with my emotions, learning how to feel again and reconnecting with my authentic self. 

As a result. I was able to maintain being a connection-based parent and all of my relationships transformed!

There is a GAP!

Over time, I have recognized a huge gap in support for parents seeking to use healthier connection-based parenting approaches.  Many of us want to do things differently than our parents and shift towards connection-based parenting but are unsure how to do so.

So, I created a proprietary framework to support fellow cycle-breaking parents like you in living with your needs met so you can pour-in-connection to your relationship with your children and bring those H.A.P.P.Y qualities.

Head over to my Welcome blog if you haven’t read it yet, you can learn about H.A.P.P.Y WELCOME BLOG.

Within that framework are all the mindset, lifestyle, and relationship insights, wisdom, tips, and tricks that I’ve gathered on the road to experiencing all relationships in a whole new light.

Introducing The HERO LIFE | HAPPY® Experience

The main purpose of the HERO LIFE | HAPPY® experience is to set you up with the mindset, lifestyle, and village to support your cognitive and emotional capacity to use healthier connection-based ways of parenting. It presents an opportunity to unpack your emotional baggage by learning how to feel your emotions alongside your children. 

You will also discover the path to becoming what I’ve coined a “Well-BEing Advocate”, who creates a village full of healthy relationships while simultaneously living with your needs met. As a result, you’ll gain the ability to deepen all your relationships and lasting happiness.

This experience will help you experiment with new mindsets that support understanding the critical elements of what a holistically healthy parenting style looks like. You and your children will have the opportunity to shift to living a H.E.R.O. Connected Lifestyle -

Healing Emotionally and Reconnecting Oneness- within yourselves, with each other, and with all of life. 

In the HERO LIFE | HAPPY® Experience there are three experiments you will be exploring.

1. Establishing a H.E.R.O Mindset
2. Setting up your H.E.R.O Connected Lifestyle
3. Creating a H.A.P.P.Y Village

Throughout my blog, I will dive deep into each of the experiments.

Also, you can grab my book “Different Than Your Parents: How to Feel Your Emotions, Build Healthy Relationships and Help Your Kids Do the Same”. Available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and many others! CLICK HERE.

Remember, you are breaking many cycles of control-based ways of relating. The shift doesn’t happen overnight. Slowly over time by exploring these three experiences, you will have a solid foundation for supporting yourself in doing things differently!

Peace and Love,

Julie

Let's Live Connected!